10 Things Student Parents Are Sick Of Hearing

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  1. “Raise your own children”. Childcare snobbery is just plain grim. Really, if you’d rather I was stuck at home claiming benefits and alternating between Jeremy Kyle and Cbeebies, you need to re-evaluate your priorities.
  2. “It must be nice to come to university and have a break”. No, on both counts. I really enjoyed studying, but it was still just as difficult as it was for everyone else – hardly a nice relaxing “break”! Also, I missed my baby like mad when I was in uni and she was in nursery – I didn’t want a break from my child.
  3. “No-one wants to hear about your kid”. So we have to hear about how many people you got off with in Liquid on Saturday night, but I’m not allowed to talk about my child’s first words?
  4. “You never come out anymore”. Priorities do shift, and often student parents do feel very guilty for cancelling plans with friends – but trust me, we don’t need reminding about it.
  5. “I don’t want kids, they’re gross”. Not wanting kids is none of my business. Saying you don’t want kids is absolutely fine. Calling all kids “gross” or “awful” with parents in earshot? It’s rude, and don’t be surprised if they call you out on it.
  6. “You’re supposed to be a mother!”. Wait, hold up. You criticise us for not coming out and getting drunk… and then when we do, you act like we’ve committed treason?! I’ve spent all day changing nappies and writing essays; I don’t need your judgment when I buy a round of shots.
  7. “You always get special treatment!”. There’s a definite attitude that student parents can’t succeed without endless extensions and applications for special consideration. I didn’t apply for an extension or special consideration once, and the one time I almost did was two weeks after I’d given birth. Not that it matters even if I had – people request extensions for being hungover; I think student parents can be forgiven for wanting extra time.
  8. “We all have personal issues!”. Student parents are not allowed to say that they’re finding something difficult without being reminded that everyone has tough times. Because apparently, we didn’t already know that.
  9. “You get so much more money than us!”. And, of course, we don’t have to spend any of it on housing suitable for a child, petrol, bills, childcare, food, milk, nappies and all the other things children need. Some people forget that we’re not spending it on two weeks all-inclusive in Mykonos.
  10. “Parents shouldn’t be allowed to study at the taxpayer’s expense”. This is a ‘nice’ way of calling student parents scroungers, and it’s a worryingly common point of view. All I’ll say is that I could have dropped out of uni when I got pregnant and never gone back, and then I’d more than likely have spent the rest of my life on benefits – or I could have stayed at university, cost a little bit more in student finance, but graduated and improved my job prospects massively. I don’t know about you, but I’m pretty sure I made the right choice.

8 thoughts on “10 Things Student Parents Are Sick Of Hearing

  1. mackenzieglanville says:

    That must really suck, as parents no matter what it feels like we are criticised no matter what we do or do not do! If we work we are wrong, if we stay at home we are lazy, if we go out we are a bad mum. I have learnt that we need to be confident in our own decisions and then we worry less about others and their stupid opinions #fartglitter


  2. Rhyming with Wine says:

    Wow! I’m amazed that people would even think these things – let alone say them! Hats off to you lovely. I can only imagine how hard you must have to work to keep all of those plates spinning. I have so much respect for any one who wants to work hard and study to build themselves (and their families) a better future. Thanks for linking up with #fartglitter. It’s fab to see you x


  3. Life as Mum says:

    One of my close friends have just graduated from Uni and she has a child {my nephew} and i am so proud of her! She’s done so well. I put my hands up to student parents!


  4. Kaye says:

    Some people have no idea how difficult it is for student parents! I went to uni before I had kids and I couldn’t even imagine having a family I had to leave to study and splitting my time. Well done you for going back to studying. Thanks for linking up to #MarvMondays. Kaye xo


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